


Sincerely, Me

by pastel_x_tea



Category: Assassin's Creed - All Media Types
Genre: I just got this idea at like midnight and had to write it I apologize in advance, Joke Fic, M/M, loosely, loosely based on dear evan hansen, well mostly a joke fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-26
Updated: 2017-05-26
Packaged: 2018-11-05 08:02:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11009298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pastel_x_tea/pseuds/pastel_x_tea
Summary: Evie helps Jacob write letters to Ned. Henry helps Ned reply.(Loosely based on the song Sincerely, Me from Dear Evan Hansen so listen to that first.)





	1. Chapter 1

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli_

“Why would you write that?"

Evie was keeled over laughing. "I'm just trying to tell the truth!"

"Well,  _stop_ trying to tell the truth! I'm trying to convince him to, you know, be my... friend. Just..." Jacob shoved Evie away from the desk. " _I'll_ do it!"

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. ~~I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli~~ Life here in London without you has been hard_

An immature chuckle. "Hard?"

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. ~~I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli~~ Life here in London without you has been ~~hard~~ bad  
_

"Baaad."

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. ~~I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli~~ Life here in London without you has been ~~hard bad~~ rough._

"Ooh, kinky!"

Jacob rolled his eyes and continued. It'd been a while since he'd last talked to Ned, so he had some things to catch him up on.

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. ~~I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli~~ Life here in London without you has been ~~hard bad~~ rough. I miss talking about life, and all the other things we talk about._

" _Very_ specific."

"Shut up!"

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. ~~I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli~~ Life here in London without you has been ~~hard bad~~ rough. I miss talking about life, and all the other things we talk about. I like my sister_

"Who says that?"

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. ~~I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli~~ Life here in London without you has been ~~hard bad~~ rough. I miss talking about life, and all the other things we talk about. ~~I like my sister~~ I love my sister, but we always fight about everything. Well, mostly about missions I've done or, in her opinion, botched. Maybe if I stopped dating people, things would be alright between us._

"'Dating people'... once again,  _very_ specific."

"Then  _you_ fix it!"

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. ~~I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli~~ Life here in London without you has been ~~hard bad~~ rough. I miss talking about life, and all the other things we talk about. ~~I like my sister~~ I love my sister, but we always fight about everything. Well, mostly about missions I've done or, in her opinion, botched. ~~Maybe if I stopped dating people, things would be alright between us.~~ Maybe if I stop dating men_

"Really, Evie?"

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it’s awful that we don’t talk that much. ~~I should tell you, though, that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples and start moaning with deli~~ Life here in London without you has been ~~hard bad~~ rough. I miss talking about life, and all the other things we talk about. ~~I like my sister~~ I love my sister, but we always fight about everything. Well, mostly about missions I've done or, in her opinion, botched. ~~Maybe if I stopped dating people, things would be alright between us.~~ Maybe if I stop dating ~~men~~ jerks, things would be alright between us._

_I should probably take a page out of your book and stop being so nice to everyone. I'll turn around, I'll become Master, wait and see. I just need to totally reinvent myself. Well, parts of myself. I'm not ditching the top hat. And maybe pay attention to whatever Evie's spouting, for once. I just have to imagine myself being Master, act like a Master, then I'll be there._

_Sincerely, me._


	2. Chapter 2

Henry sat with a cup of tea, having been invited over by a contact. Well, he could hardly call Ned a contact- they barely had any contact. But Ned said he was on an important mission, so Henry came to assist.

_De_ _ar Jacob Frye,_

"Well, I mean, he says he missed you. The only logical thing to do would be to reply the same way."

Ned didn't reply to Henry as he replied to Jacob. He was chewing his lip nervously, his feet tapping on the floor.

_Dear Jacob Frye,_

_I also miss talking to you, but I hear word of you robbing trains. Just stop dating jerks, take deep breaths, and maybe just go on a stroll around London for a little bit. Very relaxing._

"No."

_Dear Jacob Frye,_

_I also miss talking to you, but I hear word of you robbing trains. ~~Just stop dating jerks, take deep breaths, and maybe just go~~ on ~~a stroll around London for a little bit. Very relaxing.~~ I'll send you some drawings of some trains I've seen pass by or worked on._

Ned was in the middle of reaching for some train blueprints when Henry frowned. " _No_."

_Dear Jacob Frye,_

_I also miss talking to you, but I hear word of you robbing trains. ~~Just stop dating jerks, take deep breaths, and maybe just go~~ on ~~a stroll around London for a little bit. Very relaxing.~~ ~~I'll send you some drawings of some trains I've seen pass by or worked on.~~ You'd be obsessed with all my railway expertise._

Henry crossed out the words this time. " _Absolutely_ not!"

_Dear Jacob Frye,_

_I also miss talking to you, but I hear word of you robbing trains. ~~Just stop dating jerks, take deep breaths, and maybe just go~~ on ~~a stroll around London for a little bit. Very relaxing.~~ ~~I'll send you some drawings of some trains I've seen pass by or worked on.~~ ~~You'd be obsessed with all my railway expertise.~~_

_I'm proud of you, Frye. Just hang in there. Stop dating jerks. I already know you're on the path to becoming a Master Assassin. I'll "wait and see" what comes of your life. Change some things about yourself: I'll help. Change your method of charging headfirst into battle, and maybe use knives more than, you know, extremely loud guns. But leave the top hat, and the cape, and the puns, and the attitude, for sure. Pay attention to Evie. She's a pain_

"Not true..." Henry mumbled and took a sip of tea.

_Dear Jacob Frye,_

_I also miss talking to you, but I hear word of you robbing trains. ~~Just stop dating jerks, take deep breaths, and maybe just go~~ on ~~a stroll around London for a little bit. Very relaxing.~~ ~~I'll send you some drawings of some trains I've seen pass by or worked on.~~ ~~You'd be obsessed with all my railway expertise.~~_

_I'm proud of you, Frye. Just hang in there. Stop dating jerks. I already know you're on the path to becoming a Master Assassin. I'll "wait and see" what comes of your life. Change some things about yourself: I'll help. Change your method of charging headfirst into battle, and maybe use knives more than, you know, extremely loud guns. But leave the top hat, and the cape, and the puns, and the attitude, for sure. Pay attention to Evie. She's a pain but she's right about some things. Keep steady on the tracks, Frye. Don't derail._

_Sincerely, me._

"Write 'P.S.: Your sister's hot'."

"What the  _hell_."

"My bad."


	3. Chapter 3

_Dear Ned Wynert,_

_Thanks for your letters. That's all I have to say but I've also enclosed a small knife you'll probably like too. It'd fit in your jacket pocket. Or your hat, whichever is easier._

* * *

 

_Dear Jacob Frye,_

_I appreciate the knife, but really, I just like to be talking to you again. We should meet up. When's your train coming by again?_

* * *

 

And there they sat on the train. There were no letters, but also no assistance. Awful.

Jacob and Ned made small talk. Evie made kissy faces at them through the window on the door. When Jacob noticed, he got up and walked over to the door. "I do  _not_ \--!"

Ned laughed. "Sit down, Frye."

Jacob came over, profusely apologizing.

"Oh, it's fine, Frye. She's your sister, like I said, she's a pain. So... tell me about these 'jerks' you get caught up with."

"... well, is the leader of all the goddamn Blighters a good start?"

Ned's smile faded. "Oh geez... caught up with a guy like  _that_... um, Frye, that's worse than your typical jerk. That's going into arsehole territory."

"Yeah, especially when he burns down a building full of civilians!" He chuckled and shook his head. "I'm just gonna give up on this whole 'love' thing."

"Don't say that. Maybe someone will come along and sweep you off your feet, or shove you off a roof, or something similar, and change your mind."

He paused and smiled just a bit. "You know, Wynert? Maybe someone will... but, you know, maybe a girl."

"Right,  _maybe_."

The talk continued, but now it wasn't just small talk. Jacob caught Ned up on everything that'd been going on, and Ned told jokes with his quick wit. He looked at the time and swung up onto the train roof as Jacob followed. "Where are you going?"

"The wheels of London never stop... except maybe when I get tired."

"You could sleep here, you know."

"You wish." Ned chuckled. "But Frye... I don't want to just talk through letters. Which I  _know_ Evie helped you write." Ned poked the grappling hook on Jacob's gauntlet. "Swing by sometime. Without your sister, or your letters." He smiled. "That's what I think. Sincerely, me."

Jacob smiled. "I will. Sincerely, me."

 

 


End file.
